THE Power of one different

How often do we stop and really observe the behaviour of patterns — their shapes, their colours, their rhythm? The ones in our lives, not just on wallpaper or textiles. The way certain choices repeat. The same outcomes. The same lessons showing up in different forms, over and over again.

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Lately, I’ve been thinking about how recognising these patterns helps us understand what we’re doing well, and where we might need to shift. Awareness is the first step. Once we see the pattern, we get to choose - continue, or change?

I’ve never thought of myself as a life coach. But I’ve always been fascinated by our habits, our choices, and the invisible threads that seem to stitch together the same scenarios. Why do certain things keep happening to us? Or maybe, why do we keep walking into them?

Right now, the candles are on, the fire is crackling, and I’m thinking about how quickly we’ve all moved on from 2020. That strange pause. That deep global inhale. It’s like we stopped telling those stories. Life sped up again - fast - like smoke through a keyhole. A quote a good friend once told me.

I never understood it back then - I was too young, probably still in my 20s, walking barefoot through the concrete jungle on one of my many solo adventures. He seemed to have it all figured out. Calm, grounded. Meanwhile, I was still tangled in my own patterns.

Only now, looking back at the last five years, I realise just how blurry my shapes and colours had become. But that’s the beauty of reflection - it sharpens the edges, it brings contrast.

And maybe that’s where change begins. Or maybe, it’s just the cost of growing up.

We can find patterns in our backpacks, our clothes, our pencil cases. On walls. In nature - trees, ocean waves, or the stripes on Africa’s most beautiful zebras. They’re everywhere, these silent reminders.

I’ve been trying for a long time to make the patters within me beneficial. But if I’m honest, they’ve been detrimental to many of my actions over the years. And tonight - well, actually since I started writing again - I’ve had this quiet thought in the back of my mind: 

What’s the best way to come clean?

To let go of the repetitive problems, the unconscious behaviour, and the resistance of change? Maybe this is it.

Naming the pattern is the first thread pulled. And with that, something starts to unravel - something new begins. 

As the start of a new day rises, I’m already making those changes. And I hope - and believe - that you are too. Because patterns are a fundamental part of our lives, as long as they aren’t harmful.

Recognise your actions. Make those positive changes. And in doing so, we all improve our lives.

It’s scary to step outside our comfort zone, so I’m going to share my five steps with you. What you do with them is up to you. But when you see me next, trust that I’m doing my best - there is only space for those willing to travel this journey side by side. 

Step 1: Do one different thing

Step 2: Observe …

Step 3: Keep doing the different thing, until it becomes the new pattern

Step 4: Keep observing …

Step 5: Do another different thing. 

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Boundaries aren’t walls to keep people out, they are tools to let the right energy in. - Ine Grace

@alberteppo